We talk a lot about finding a work-life balance. What balance? Sometimes, you might feel like the kid on the seesaw whose legs never quite touch the ground. One minute you’re up, the next you’re down, and then you hit the ground so hard that you’re not sure you’ll get back up. That’s life, right?
It doesn’t have to be.
A work-life balance is important for overall health, even if it seems impossible. Learning to leave work at work is a skill set. If you don’t know how to do it, the good news is you can learn!
Set Office Hours
Setting office hours is possible even if you don’t have a 9-to-5 job. If your office provides your hours, it’s easy enough to do. Freelance and gig economy workers must choose their hours. It’s important to have a set schedule, even if it’s a flexible one.
If you’re the one setting your schedule, prioritize self-care and family time, so work doesn’t eat into those hours. Consider that time sacrosanct. You are off the clock, and you may need to silence your cell phone or walk away from your laptop for a bit to remember that work shouldn’t be interrupting your personal time unless it’s an actual, legitimate emergency.
Setting office hours is simply a matter of setting and maintaining healthy boundaries. No one should expect you to be available around the clock unless you’re on call for your job. Decide when you’ll take time for yourself, making sure to respect your own boundaries by not slipping back into work mode unnecessarily.
Put Work in Perspective
Your job might be essential. You could save lives. You may even see work as both your passion and purpose. That’s great, but it doesn’t mean much if you don’t have a life outside of work. Balance keeps you physically and mentally healthy. You still need to have a healthy home life no matter how important your job might be to you.
It’s a safe bet that the world won’t end if you make a mistake — so stop over-thinking it. Work has a purpose, and it also has a place. Put work into perspective in the grand scheme of your life. It’s important, but will you be thinking about it on your deathbed? Probably not.
Examine Workaholic Tendencies
Your work ethic is admirable, but you may want to ask yourself if you’re using it to avoid dealing with personal issues. Under that workaholic exterior could be a person who needs a lot of external validation or someone who’s trying to avoid addressing a problem. Examine your workaholic tendencies to see if you may actually be avoiding something or using work to source your self-worth. In case no one has told you today, you are worthy already.
If you uncover avoidance or self-esteem issues, you can get to work on them. This step will make it easier to leave work back at the office instead of working all the hours of the day. You may even find that the elusive work-life balance begins to come more easily to you.
Communicate Clearly
A big part of setting boundaries and leaving work at work is talking to coworkers about your expectations. You may even want to define “emergency” for those who think a routine email qualifies. Clear communication may help ward off late-night or early morning phone calls.
Let coworkers know if there are hours that are completely off-limits. You probably won’t be available to answer routine work questions when you’re attending a child’s recital or at a doctor’s appointment. You don’t have to share exactly what you’ll be doing to communicate clearly either. Just let other staff know when you’ll be available to help after hours and when you won’t be. Make sure to reinforce boundaries by ignoring calls that come in during the times you’ve set aside for yourself.
Practice Mindfulness
Mindfulness is about more than just meditating or grounding yourself. It’s being fully present in whatever you’re doing. When you’re at work, be there fully — minimizing personal distractions, which will help you get your work done efficiently. When you’re at home, be fully present, too. Staying in the moment can help you better engage in your relationships with family and friends, and it can also have the side benefit of keeping your mind off work. Wherever you are, be there fully.
Practicing mindfulness can allow you to achieve an actual work-life balance. You won’t feel like that child on the seesaw anymore, being tossed up and down while struggling not to toss your cookies. You may even notice that your work and home life improve as you invest more of yourself in them at the appropriate times.
Finding the balance may not be easy, but you can learn with practice. If you start to blur the line between work and home again, take a deep breath and remember that you’re no good to either if you burn out. Learning to leave work at the office (or in your home office) gets easier with time. It’s often a matter of remembering that when you say NO to work in your personal time, you’re saying YES to yourself.
